Archive | January 2015

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Bobby Womack dreams of California and your heart breaks.

Your mother dances at the window, all soft sunshine gold, and it is the saddest thing.


hurting before tomorrow’s here.

So, I missed an entry yesterday—but not much of importance occurred. I woke. I didn’t exercise, I needed to take a rest day. I did not have my cocoa, I had plain spaghetti for lunch and instead skipped dinner. I read. I napped. I wrote. I wandered through Mirkwood well until after 3 in the morning.

I also took a couple creepy late-night pictures.

Today was… no more lively than all the others, but here I am anyways.

Despite having stayed up well past the time I’d like to go to bed and despite having dutifully ignored my alarm this morning, I still managed to wake up before noon. Score to me.

I had my cocoa and I exercised— still only 12 push-ups, my plank went down to 48 seconds, and my squats went up to 35. When I plank, I shake a lot and that bothers me; I don’t know if I’m doing something wrong with my posture or if that’s normal. Obnoxious. I also figure I need to have some kind of post-exercise dairy, perhaps start putting milk in my cocoa or return to regularly drinking chocolate milk. (It’s good for the muscles, studies prove it!)

I don’t recall reading. Instead, I hopped right into writing for a bit.

I had lunch this time, omelettes. And while I ate, I watched Judge Judy.

(As I write this, I’m hearing Enya’s Orinoco Flow somewhere in the house and that makes me happy.)

And then I hopped over to a video for a crochet tutorial and began work on the beanie that mum requested. I have the top finished and tomorrow I’ll move on to rounds of puff stitches. There’s a lot of counting involved in this and I’m sure I’ve tripped up several times over, but I’m pushing ahead.

I also scribbled down a ton of notes to prepare for my quest to achieve kindred status with both the Inn League and the Ale Association. Wish me luck!

Then there was actually dinner tonight. (What’s that, two meals in one day?! Progress!) Breakfast for dinner— bacon, sausage, eggs and potatoes. Mmm mmm.

Finally… I absolutely have to go to bed on time. Because I need to get up early tomorrow and dress for real so I can take my sister to school, swing by the bank, and begin some job hunting. My anxiety is through the roof. I feel like throwing up, I feel like crying. I am absolutely petrified at the notion of leaving my home and walking into places to ask after any openings. How awful is that? It’s making my head hurt. But I’m going to do it, I will do it. Eughhhhhhhhhhh.

Let me head off to Middle-Earth now.


Again, did not fall asleep until much later than I would have liked and unfortunately did so without setting an alarm— but quite surprisingly, managed to wake up only an hour later than my ideal.

Exercises: I managed to upgrade to 12 push-ups, 30 squats and my plank lasted an easy minute and fifteen seconds. It’s sadly easy to tell that I’ve been out of work for four months because it’s only day two and my legs are absolutely killing me.

I read forty some pages, enjoyed my cocoa, skipped lunch again and whipped up a delicious dinner of chicken ramen noodles. Note to self: look up real recipes involving ramen noodles.

I worked on my crochet a bit more. I have the start of a blanket and the skein of my current color only had one more row left in it, so now I must put this project to the wayside until I find a new color that will blend well with the two I have in place now. But now that I have more hooks to work with, I can start on something new. I’m thinking of being ambitious and trying for a beanie.

I wrote. Not much, but enough. Still working on getting on the habit with that, and I’m unfortunately feeling tired around midday. I did not nap today! So maybe that will help matters.

I’m closing today off with some gaming. Hopping onto Lord of the Rings Online to conquer some deeds—today’s region is the Shire where I have some slugs and harvest-flies to slay, and some Innkeepers to assist. Then I think perhaps I’ll hop over to creep side and see if I can rank up my Warg a bit. Fun times, fun times.

Also, some peach soda.

die erste Tag.

I welcomed 2015 quietly – taco lasagna with the family and battling orcs in Mirkwood. A few more runs of the Stand at Amon Sûl instance and I’ll achieve kindred status with the Eglain. (And by a few more, I mean 29. And by everything else, I’m talking Lord of the Rings Online.) Then it was attempting to be in bed by 11, but lying around wide awake until about 2:30 and needing to set my alarm clock if I wanted to get up at a decent hour.

I managed to get up at eight in the morning and though I needed an hour nap in the middle of the day, an hour which extended into three hours because fuck the alarm, I managed a fairly decent start on the first day of the new year.

I used my new camera. After taking the pups out for their morning walk, I grabbed my Nikon and headed right back out for a few quick shots.

I read. Not the hundred pages that I would have liked, but at least sixty pages and that’s a decent start. I’m out of practice, but I intend to read every day and I should get back into the swing of things with ease.

I wrote.

I washed my face, took care of my teeth. I even remembered to do my exercises— I’m not setting a particular goal. I’m just selecting a handful of exercises targeting the areas I want to work on the most and simply seeing how many of them I can do, and then just watch the number go up and up and up. Today, I managed 10 push-ups, a 34 second plank, and I completely lost count of my squats because my sister was talking to me. Damn her.

Better diet? Maybe not so much. I had my cup of hot chocolate to start the day, skipped lunch, then ate a bowl of super cheesy macaroni for dinner. So that’s obviously something to work on.

Now it’s another quiet night, everything slowly coming to an end. My eyes are tired and I’m not sure how to spend my last few minutes before tucking in.

Either way. So far, so good.